Completely and entirely heartbroken
by Destinydei
Summary: Arthur has been left by Alfred and is unable to endure the pain.They kept their relationship a secret to prevent political tensions,but Arthur is afraid he won't be able to go on like this just swallowing it.Willsomeone find out or maybe even comfort him?
1. Prologue

Authors note.I'm trying to work up my last relationship with Feelings are a close reflection of my feelings.I'm from Germany,but I thought that Arthur fits in much better.I have the same eye color^^

Completely and entirely heartbroken

~Prologue

To Alfred,

I can't believe it,I just can' told me that I'm the love of your live and that you wanted to marry me next year and now you just broke of with why? I believed single word of love that you said to they all lies? All of them? I thought there's something special between you and me but obviously I'm once again just the stupid Idiot that felt in love so deep.I can't think of your stupid smile without told me to keep it a secret because you're a wimp,so afraid of international I've realized now that it was just emberassing for you to be in a relationship with me,the stupid and emotional your words,just should warn the rest of the world,you are just to cruel to be so wonderful...

And handsome,and smart,and strong and...Oh god,how come you just made me full so much in love with you just to break my fragile heart? Thats not fair! You're heartless.I'm pretty sure that this all was just fun for you.A 've been playing with my heart but now you decided to hurt someonelse.I'm so silly,I would even forgive you,if you just asked for forgiveness.I can't help myself... I've never felt something like this,never...But all you got on your mind is pride,your might,your if you have to sacrifce mine for know what? You are the love of my at last I thought would if you were the men that I fell in love that's not you...I'm glad that you are showing me the true Alfred one that I wanted to spent the rest of my life with doesn't could've been so perfect,WE could've been so happy,but you probably just want someone who is nobody is perfect,especially not me,that's why this are my last words to you:I still love you.

Yours sincerely,

Arthur.

Hi,my Name is Arthur Kirkland,I'm a nation,UK to be exact and this is the letter that I wrote to ,I wanted to sent it to this evil monster,but I still have my whats left of it,and believe me thats not much right me crazy or call me a wimp,I don't care.I didn't care about anything else then him until last week,when we were still together,and now I don't care about anything cause I've lost him.I know most people would say I'm childish or silly,but I'm just one of this people that fall in love very him.I wish I knew that earlier... But it makes no sense to lament over 's not worth ,he still means a hell lot to me ,but I'm working on it.I wonder what I'm supposed to do about the Wolrd going to be one hell of a hardship for I'm still Arthur Kirkland,the proud (and now heartbroken) Nation of the sea.I've destroyed the letter and I try to find comfort in distraction,but somehow most of the movies I want to watch are my precious Harry Potter has been so influenced by ,I'llread books then.I still have. ''Going Postal'' written by the awesome Terry knows that love is not a stupid Hollywood Movie.I'll go to bed now.I guess I'll still read for a while but,then I have to sleep.


	2. Chapter 1

I can't help matter what I do,I can't stop thinking about him.I can't do I want to watch some news,a random commercial for some american stuff shows I turn on my radio to listen to the news there, then a random american song shows the problem is,I'm a nation,so I can't just stop being who I am,and what I am .My country,my people would just you can't judge me.I've spent most of my life with this idiot.I've raised him,I've watched him grow up.I get single day is a torture for reminds me of him.I can't get more sleep then 3 or 4 hours.I'm too busy trying not to think about then,at 2 or 3 in the morning I just surrender to the thoughts that have been on my mind for more then 1 ,one week is normaly not a very long time but it's enough to kill you inside when its one week without the person you wanted to spend the rest of your life just how much pain every single second can cause you when you just see or think of a picture of him or how I feel most of the day.I stand up,already depressed,wondering why I don't just stay in bed for the rest of the day,unable to stop telling myself that I've lost my reason to get out of bed,to go to meetings,to live.I'm so sick of this live.I would probably think of commiting suicide if I was a normal person,and not a nation with the responsibilty for millions of would be all alone,unable to defend his Micro-Country against Nations like Russia or I really care for him.I won't make the same mistakes I did when I raised feels like someone is pulling on the strings that are keeping the rest of my heart together.I still have a heart,and it's only metaphoricall broken,but I'm unable to be happy when my heart doesn't reminder,every memory pulls at the strings of my heart.A good example for this cruel reminders is helping Peter with his homework.I told him to attend a nice and quiet private school in today he came home with the most horrible task I could ever hopped trough the door,with a big smile on his sweet little face, played a while with Hanatamago (Finland and Sweden are on vacation) and then stepped next to me.I stopped reading my book which helped me to stop thinking,and ironically Peter was the one who pushed me right where I didn't allow my thoughts to go for looked at me with his big innocent eyes,opened his mouth and said: ''Brother Arthur,can you help me with my english ?'' Well,thats not very shocking,but when I opened his book on the page he told me,I knew that he was not going to have his homework done for even not for months.I looked at the task he had to do for school,and my heart stopped task was:''Write down what you alreadyabout the American your parents or legal guardian if they know more about it and if they can help you do some research''. The words ''American'' and ''Dream'' just killed obvious why the ''American'' hurts me so much,but I also had a dream about Alfred last night.  
>The dream was about his..erm.. physical 't judge me! I also have needs.I'm not as desperate to get laid as he is,I prefer much lovelier and cosily then just jumping someone.I'm afraid thats all he ever wanted,the reason why he wanted to date me in the first thats what hurts the always asked me to send him kinky pictures.I'm sure that I've sent him 300 photos at the dream was just so nice,but the terrible and lonely feeling after waking up and realizing that I'll never have this again is just to cruel for me to just made love,to say it in a corny way,and he was so friendly and caring.I have to admit that I'm always the bottom one,the ''uke'' as Kiku would say it in his weird way.I can't remember the dream very well,only I'm glad about this.I don't need dream interpretation to know what it dream Alfred was only my treated me as if we are 're right Alfred,we are not even,but not in the way you see it.I should have known how cruel and self-centered you harsh break-up during the Revolution was the best are very proud of your achievements,and I have to admit that you can be proud of them,but you over-egg the pudding a bit too exaggerate your own merits.I always imagine how it would be if we were normal humans,at a High-School in your nation knows that you are bisexual,but you would try to hide it.I still have strong memories of your World-Academy and your stupid American 's so like would be a team Captain or something og that kind,dump and brutal,just like the brats in these stupid Teen-Movies.I would be that would be a I were a boy there,you would probably bully me all the time,making fun of my bisexuality.I would be so ashamed of myself,feeling rather worthless,because I'm sure I would fall in love with you again.I've just never been able to stop my would happen in one of your quitter moments,when we are people like you are always idiots when in in a group of more then off like crazy,acting so stupid,as if you own the school.I know there is a soft core deep inside you,but right now I think its very very very a supermassive black and you're stupid science-fiction stuff! You are always dreaming of a even better future,as if today is not perfect enough for is good enough in your I'm the last perfect thing for I have feelings,and thats what you just don't much I loved I still do,even though you've been so cruel to the biggest problem I have to deal with right whole life is ruled by my else becomes that brings me back to his needs my help,but I'm afraid I might be unable to talk about the ''American Dream''.Its such a hypocritical like claim to be the best country in this world,and that all of us would be lost without are you so arrogant? I don't really hate your as the nation you are,but as the self-centered person that you really what horrible mistakes did I make whereby you've become likes this?I wish I could go back in time.I would change so right now I can't decide if I would change you or or relationship.I'm not sure about anything right of the fact that I have to fight against my feelings,or I won't be able to help Peter grow boy still needs always says he is ''a big nation'',but the only things that are big on him are his mouth and his pure so cute to see how deeply committed he cares for his his they are still staring at me,confused why I'm frozen on the ,Arthur Kirkland,recollect yourself,you've complained enough for a year,its time to go back to else Peter will ask ''Uncle Francis'' for help.I turned my head to look at him.''Oh,I'm sorry Peter,my thoughts got carried away'' I patted his blond head and tried to smile at last a noticed that poor excuse of a smile and asked:''Are you sad Big Brother?''.He always calls me that when he tries to cheer me 't he cute?''No,I just don't feel so well right now.I think I could use some rest''-''Why don't we visit another nation?Oh,I want to see Uncle said he would help me to become even stronger'' Oh god,just what the bloody hell is Matthias idea of ''becoming strong''? I'm a bit worried now.I'm afraid he could think its a good idea to teach Peter how to use axe-swinging psychopath.''I...I don't think thats a good we could visit his brother,Norway'' I like him,he is quit,smart and didn't call me crazy when I introduced my supernatural friends to we have a lot in loves books even more then I do,and I guess he starts to like my precious Rooibush he has the same attitude when it comes to dealing with annoying bad I never choked Alfred,he totaly deserves ,violence is never a good way to deal with idiots like got bored of me staring into the air and pulled on my sleeves.''Arthuuuuur,are you still alive?''-''Oh,did I lose myself in thoughts again?'' -''Yes,I really think you could need some rest,old men.'' He ran away laughing,knowing that I won't be so happy about this.''Oh,you silly little boy,come back here right now!'' I tried to catch him but he was too fast for me and hid in my closet.''Peter,come out now,you need to pack your suitcase if you want to go to Norway with me''.I saw trough the door crack that Peter made a face and laid his finger on his lower lip to he smiled,said ''ok'' and stepped out of my closet.I tickled him as a revenge for the ''old men'' and Peter shouted:''Thats not fair,you cheated meeeee'' I smiled a real smile thanks to his cheerfullness and answered:''Yes,I'm so bad.I'm a sly man'' One second later I had to laugh about my own silly statement.''Come on little one,put youre clothes in your Peter Pan-suitcase so we can go''-Peter complained:'' Don't call me ''little'',I'm a grown up,like you''. I once again had to laugh about his rebellious way and his funny little pout,and decided that I teased him enough for a ran off to his room and I started gathering my stuff too.<p> 


End file.
